Your Negative Self-Image is Holding You Back

Once I started to work on myself and recognized how my body was responding to trauma, how the tension in my body was feeding my need to defend and protect myself, I realized how that fed into my beliefs that there was something wrong with me.
There was something wrong but there was nothing wrong with me. What was wrong was that I had carried a negative self image for such a long time that I did not see how it made me feel about myself. It had become the lens through which I saw the world.
As I worked to help my body let go of chronic tension and find balance, the defensive side of me would flare up, showing up in how I approached my relationships, expecting the worst and defaulting to self-sabotage. But as my body began to finally feel safe, a new awareness of myself emerged. 
As I learned to be present in my body and connected to the present moment, I started to hear my own thoughts. It was a bit shocking in the beginning. All this time, I thought others were judging me, making me feel bad about myself. It was then that I realized that I was the one doing the judging. Because I believed that I was bad, then everything I was attempting to do, be, or accomplish was immediately a bad idea and I believed that I did not deserve it. I was in a constant state of conflict that created tension within myself. It was exhausting.
The first painful realization of this was in my own marriage. I have told my clients that it took me 12 years to trust that my husband was here to stay. That is how powerful and invasive my judgement was of myself and my husband. I did not believe that I was good enough to deserve his love and that it was only a matter of time before he would hurt me or leave me because he would figure out the truth, that I was a bad person. 
But all of this conflict was being creating by me, because I couldn't stop judging myself.
How are you judging yourself? I think most of us can immediately think of how. Most survivors have a stronghold on one core belief that feels almost impossible to shift. Is that you?  
Part of your healing is to practice awareness, understand the judgements, and realize the difference between the judgement and the reality. Find support to pin down these painful beliefs. With self compassion and kindness, understand the judgements that we have about ourselves and others, understand that they are fed by our beliefs, and then set out to to use mindfulness and/or journaling to correct them.
You know the truth now, you do. It is within you. You have the power now to be kind, encouraging, and authentic to yourself. It takes time, intention and awareness, but you can do it and you are worth it. 
And remember, always, that I believe in you. 

Ready to change your negative thinking cycle? Not sure where to start?  Don’t worry.  I can help!  Just follow (this link) or call 619-889-6366 to reserve a one-hour coaching session with me ($125).  Let me help you with the next step to heal your life. You deserve it! Reserve your spot NOW! 

Have you read my new book, “Releasing Your Authentic Self”?  If you’re ready to do the deep, hard work of emotional healing, this book is for YOU!!  You’ll find it at Amazon in paperback (link) or Kindle (link).  Enjoy and happy reading!

Are you looking for more support?  I have created a closed Facebook group for the readers of “Releasing Your Authentic Self”  If you are ready to dig deep, and want to experience the daily support, encouragement from others like you. Follow this link to learn moreReleasing Your Authentic Self Support Group. 

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